If Political Parties Were Restaurants…

Imagine a town with two restaurants. One of them recently switched to an all-Maltese-food menu; the country club crowd, few but very wealthy, is having a fad for Maltese cuisine. This restaurant offers one cheap item called “Maltese fried chicken” for everyone else.

The other restaurant also wants to compete for the same monied crowd, and has just created its own all-Maltese menu. Although it includes an “Maltese burger” as well for everyone else.

Many of the town’s citizens dislikes Maltese food; and Maltese fried chicken and Maltese burgers taste fake and strange.

The citizens have stopped going to the restaurants, which are making money off the rich even though they’re half-empty.  Instead they’re eating at food trucks that came to town to fill the gap.

One food truck serves the same food that the two restaurants used to serve; it’s very popular with people who like fresh, wholesome food.

The other food truck serves Maltese cuisine like the restaurants do:  but deep-fried, and smothered in blue cheese dressing and hot sauce.  It’s very popular with people who don’t like being told when something’s bad for them.

Both restaurants want to drive both food trucks out of town, the healthy one and the unhealthy one alike.  They’d rather be the only choices in town, even if they’re half empty; after all, it’s not like they’re not making money.

Worse, both restaurants really hate one another now; each wants to be the only restaurant in town.  Even though they’re much more alike than they’ve ever been before.  Funny how that works.

And if it all goes that way, there’ll be one half-empty restaurant left in town serving food that’s fit only for a small and wealthy subset of the community.  There’ll be nothing else, for anyone.

Personally, I’d say it’s past time to learn how to cook again.  Or find a food truck you like, somewhere.

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